Mindful Parenting Tips

How mindfulness helps you ‘see’ your kids and teens

I was inspired to write this after reading a blog from NY psychotherapist, Katherine Schafler, about the 4 unconscious questions a person asks themselves.  The one that connected with me the most was about ‘being seen’.

As a child I grew up in a culture where ‘children should be seen and not heard’.  This attitude may have been exclusive to the Victorian/Scottish parenting style at the time, but as an adult, it has left me with lots of thoughts and feelings to work through and process – sometimes with the help of a therapist or my meditation practice.

I am also a foster carer and one of the key things I’ve learned is that ‘being seen’ is essential in order to have a connection with the children we care for. 

I believe that my mindfulness skills, my personal meditation practice and my ability to introduce a ‘teaching meditation’ to the kids we care for in a way that meets their needs and abilities (and interests) has helped us start to build a an emotional and mental bridge between the world and kids in our care so that they can connect to the world around them in a more kind, loving and caring way.

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The #MeToo campaign and mindfulness

 

Like me you have probably become aware of the #MeToo campaign which highlights the level of sexual harassment that women experience throughout their lives.

As we can see, it has been an underlying epidemic that females have tolerated for thousands of years in all areas of life.

But I’m uncomfortable with the idea of saying #MeToo and adding my voice to social media.

I don’t deny that I’ve had some unsavoury and traumatising experiences growing up that I would rather forget.  My yoga and meditation practice has (and continues) to help me heal from this.

However the #MeToo campaign leaves me hanging.   It feels a little bit like watching a tragedy on the news and feeling helpless to ease the pain of those involved.  I observe friends saying #MeToo on social media and then I start to worry and wonder about them and their experiences.

It also hangs guilt and shame on the wrong shoulders – of the decent boys, teens and men who don’t want to treat women that way.  Perhaps If I were a man, maybe I would lower my gaze and no longer feel confident engaging with females.

But if I sit and reflect on the #MeToo campaign through my meditation practice, I have a sense that …

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back to school – with mindfulness

Helping kids return to school with less anxiety (and more mindfulness)

In Scotland our schools have already returned after the summer break, but in the rest of the UK (and perhaps worldwide) children and teens will be gearing up for their return.

Some will feel excited about the prospect of a new school or new term.  However many will feel anxious.

Cast your mind back to what school was like for you growing up and perhaps it will help you access some empathy and compassion for the young people in your life.

Returning back to school is a challenge for many, but we can give our kids some mindful skills to help them negotiate this tricky time.

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Helping kids be mindful during the holidays

 

Mindfulness and the holidays

The summer holidays can be a long time to spend with your kids.

You love them but your whole routine can change and even though holidays are meant to be enjoyable, they can be a little bit stressful too!

So here are some tips and ideas to help you keep up your meditation practice and help your kids practise mindfulness during the summer break.

(Photo courtesy of Jennifer Furtney Miller – “Here is my 5 year old son meditating in the pool. Trying to compose himself during a conflict with his 7 year old sister. We love this photo. He often joins us at 6am to meditate too. Namaste.”) Continue reading

15 seconds to change schools with meditation and mindfulness

 

One of my friends is an experienced mindfulness teacher.

She sent me her weekly newsletter and within that there is mention of  Dr Rick Hanson – the psychologist – with a link to one of his excellent presentations.

It was so good I thought I would include it in my regular blog (see below).

But it got me thinking.

Dr Hanson talks about the importance of him learning meditation skills, especially to help him recover from the difficult times he had growing up – you know the regular growing pains most of us go through and the feeling of not fitting in or being quite good enough.

He talks about how mindfulness has helped fill the ‘hole in his heart’ that these experiences created. Continue reading

Children with ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) and sleep issues

(Guest blog written by one of our Connected Kids Level 1 Students from Denmark…)

Many children with ADHD have difficulty falling asleep at night, and parents of children with ADHD often see that their children rarely seem to be rested when it is time to go to school.

When children go to school or kindergarten feeling tired, it means that their internal battery is not fully charged. They get into conflict more easily, find it harder to stay focused, and their emotions are unstable because of a poor night’s sleep.

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5 Ways Mindfulness Creates Resilience in Children

 

At the moment the world is quite a turbulent place.  If we think our children are too innocent or immune to the stories coming out in the media each day – think again.

Every time we listen to the news on the radio, watch it on TV or surf social media and the internet when our kids are around – they absorb what they hear and see.  Even if they don’t understand it.

So we have a choice.  We can either shield children completely from the world around them (but how do we stop this going on in the playground at school, sometimes in the classroom and at sleepovers?) Or we can help them build their resilience and cope with the ‘bad things and people’ in this world. Continue reading

Breathing in Breathing out Meditation for Kids

 

Some of you may remember that several years ago I attended an Educator’s retreat with Thich Nhat Hanh.

During the retreat we learned some mindfulness songs for kids –  this was one of my favourites.

Acknowledging the breath can be a difficult concept for kids to grasp.  This breathing meditation video for kids gives a great example of actions, words and song to engage their interest.

By helping kids of all ages to notice their breath they have a self-care skill that can help them move out of fight/flight/freeze and lower anxiety levels. 

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How to top up your ‘compassion’ tank

 

Is your compassion tank feeling a bit depleted?

If you really want to teach kids (yours or others) how to practise meditation but your self-compassion tank is a bit empty, then it’s time to refuel!

Enjoy our blog on 4 simple self-compassion tips on how to do this!

 

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Getting kids to eat – mindfully with chocolate

The festive season is upon us and we know how much chocolate and cookies we’ll be eating (and especially our kids!).

So to help us through this ‘sweet season’ here’s a guide to eating chocolate (or cookies) mindfully that both you and your children can enjoy.

Happy holidays!

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